March 29. We’re pleased to unveil the first in our new line
of Suzy Porter’s Unreliable Facts. Ms Porter assured us that she’d
met David Essex at our 100 Club gig and that he’d told her he
has started knocking out his own line of sex toys and accessories.
A startling exclusive, and a puzzling one as David Essex wasn’t
at the 100 Club... Upon investigation, it emerged that Suzy had
confused the chirpy Cockney star with UK porn legend Ben Dover!
(Ben looks more like Tony Feedback to us, although his ‘Long Tall
Shorty’ doesn’t bear thinking about...). So David Essex has not
gone David Sessex on us. A shame really because he could have
had the ‘Cock-On’ dildo attachment for lesbians, the ‘Hold Me
Close’ micro-vibrator, the ‘Gonna Make You Go Ahhh’ mega-rabbit
and all three together as a special ‘That’ll Be The Day, This’ll
Be The Night’ discount package. More Snoozy Suzy Unreliable Facts
Meantime, here’s an absolutely reliable hot exclusive: Matthew
Newman has just agreed to join the re-formed Case as lead singer.
The full line-up is confirmed as the three original members Matt
(vocals), Rob (guitar) and Martin (drums), plus our pal Mark Wyeth
on bass and John O'Neil from Bad Manners on sax. But never mind
that, where’s Baby Greensleeves?
Gal’s podcast is up now here,
featuring a twenty minute Dave Barker chat, three 335 acoustic
songs, and the usual red hot tracks (see yesterday’s entry for
Maninblack need a bass player – fast! Must be over 30, have
pro gear, be into geezer-punk and live in New York City. Have
MORE potential David Sessex
products: David Essex's Silver Dream Machine (operates on a standard
car battery), the Imperial Wizard ('perfect under the sheets')
and the deluxe, multi-grip 'Myfanwy' as recommended by Batttttty...
March 28: Gal recorded his latest podcast at the weekend with
reggae legend Dave “I am the magnificent” Barker, and hot blues
band the 335. Dave, of Dave & Ansell Collins fame, plugged the
superb International Ska Festival that’s coming to the Clapham
Grand next month (April 22nd – 24th) and spoke movingly about
his career. This wonderfully talented, humble guy never made a
brass farthing from his classic mega hits ‘Double Barrel’ and
‘Monkey Spanner’ – it really is shocking. He’ll be performing
with Ansell in Clapham for the first time in forty years. Also
on the show, Dave and Foxy from the 335 knocked out a blinding
acoustic mini-set, while Gal played stonkin’ tracks from the Phobics,
the De Rellas, the Cundeez, Boss Beat, Evil Conduct and many more.
Special mention to 335 manager Snoozy Suzy whose unreliable facts
are surely destined to become a show staple.
Saturday saw a visit to Nads HQ both of FB and more surprisingly
McMighty, a mysterious figure from the Gonads’ past said by experts
to have been one of the greatest guitarists (if not the greatest)
ever to have coming within gobbing distance of the band. Gal produced
his trusty old Tanglewood (careful!) and over Stella & a Chinese
take-away an impromptu jamming session ensued which has resulted
in two head-rattlingly awesome new Nads classics, ‘Backstreet
Army’ and ‘Dirty Girl’, being put to bed as niftily as Charlie
Sheen in a hotel room full of porn stars.
Now confirmed, Booze & Glory and The Warriors will be supporting
us at The Maiden’s Head gig in Canterbury on June 11th. It’s a
6.30pm kick off.
Stop Press: Fat Col was arrested at the big TUC march on Saturday.
He wasn’t on it, he’d gone along to mount a solo counter-demo
waving a placard demanding ‘Cut more! Slash The State! Sack all
social workers! Have A Wash, You Soapy Bastards! Long Live the
Conservative Revolution!’ and was detained for his own safety.
Nip over to www.clubska.com to see a trailer for Symarips’ new
DVD and Club Ska’s opening night at the 100 Club on 18th June.
You can place an advance order for the Old Firm Casuals’ debut
A decent review of our gig with the HM Kids at the 100 Club
from Mark Taylor at Uber Rock: ‘Dangling his Gonads one more time
was Garry Bushell who first fronted this band back in 1977. Singing
his battle cries of Oi, Bushell and his band rattled out some
punk delights. Also in his band was guitarist Nacho Jase last
seen getting wasted in Pete Way's Waysted. Even the bolt headed
Frankenskin put in an appearance. Bushell certainly brought Oi
back and barking tonight.’ It’s all here.
March 27. Stop Press: strong rumours reach us that Vince Riordan
will be rejoining the Cockney Rejects on bass sometime this year,
with Tony Van Frater moving on to rhythm guitar... that’s gonna
Spare a moment please to remember the great Ian Dury, the true
Poet Laureate of London town, who died eleven years ago today.
All together: ‘There are jewels in the crown of England's glory/Too
numerous to mention, but a few/And every one could tell a different
story/And show old England's glory something new... (Cont tonight
at the Sydney Arms)
Trivial trivia aside: the Gonads pub quiz team yomped to victory
last night, making us the reigning punk pub quiz champions for
the South East of England (and the undefeated Punk Quasar Champions
of the UK). “From Brentwood to Sevenoaks, from Burwash to Whitehall,
we took the lot, we done ’em all”, quoth The Beast.
March 26. Okay, this is official; we’re playing the Maiden’s
Head in Wincheap, Canterbury, on Sat 11th June. And, says Fat
Col, any maidens who wish to provide head should see him for a
place on the guest-list. This guy ought to be on the stage...
in a burning theatre.
There’s been an incredible international reaction to the idea
of a pukka new Oi album, compiled by Gal, with mega bands from
Spain, Sweden, Germany, France, the UK and the USA queuing up
to get involved. It now looks likely that a label bigger and more
prestigious/reliable than Soitenly will be releasing it later
this year. Fat Col moans that he has been “dropped like a hot
Gaddafi” but as Waistrel explains “big boys’ rules” now apply.
“We have to be in it to win it,” quoth his Lordship, channelling
the spirit of the great punk guru Dale ‘Creosote Boat’ Winton.
*Gal records a new podcast today with reggae legend Dave Barker,
of Dave & Ansell Collins fame, and blues boys the 335. We’ll let
you know when it’s up and running.
Random bollo: Mighty Max Splodge is set to record his first album
since The Artful Splodger in a deal set up by Beast Enterprises...
the excellent Pennycocks from Barcelona are currently recording
their first album... and the Members have a new ep out next week.
They’re also playing/desecrating some church in Brentford, round
the corner from Rat Scabies’s house on Friday. In other gigs news,
Roddy Radiation & The Skabilly Rebels play Grumpy’s in Runcorn
on St George’s Day, plus support The Amnesiacs and DJ Dave ‘Rudeboy’
Achillies; tickets £10, doors open 6PM-2AM, Bar till 1AM... The
Snipes play a comeback gig at the Art School, Glasgow on April
16... there’s a two day punk fest at the Witchwood, Ashton-under-Lyne
on May 1st and 2nd for Jason Carroll’s stag weekend, with GBH,
Drongos for Europe, Gimp Fist and many more. Two-day tickets are
£18 advance or a score on the door... and finally our pal Jo77
is involved in a big punk charity gig in Newcastle on the 5th
June for Sara's Hope Foundation. More details to follow.
Our girl Batttttty reports on last night's HMK gig in Sutton-In-Ashfield.
Apparently the Kids, with Johnny 'Nasty Nick' Altman giving it
large on vocals, were on daz'zling form, and there was a great
party atmosphere both on and off stage. In her excitement at describing
their energetic performance it slipped out that Bats would like
to know what brand of arse-dissolving cream HMK's snake-hipped
guitarist Justin McConville has been using, and please could he
rub some on hers. (Update from Bats "Oi you,
I never said that!")
March 24. Not that this blog is back or anything, but we’ve
just heard Madness are playing Meltdown in June. Ray Davies, who
is curating this year’s event at the Royal Festival Hall, has
also signed up Wire, The Fugs, The Sonics and The Crazy World
Of Arthur Brown for the do, which takes places between June 10th
and 19th. Ray will play sets on two nights, with the Royal Philharmonic
Orchestra, and various Pythons will be having a chat.
Random news and whispers: Little Stevie reckons Bruce Springsteen
will release a solo album next year – his first since 2006. Almost
as immense, a source close to the WM tells us that he is planning
a solo ep, the working title of which is ‘Lions’... Monkish have
just recorded their debut album... Agnostic Front have got all
the tracks from their new album up on their myspace page... Government
Warning’s album ‘No Moderation’ is out again on vinyl... Fat Mike
from NOFX is writing a musical... Paramour are recording a new
album... and the new Maximumrocknroll (issue 335) is out now packed
with interviews with the likes of Devour, Icon Gallery, Siege,
1981, Crazy Spirit, and Attention Span. There’s a Michigan scene
report too... more updates on Sunday.
March 23. A horrific incident today has jolted us out of our
silence. Police were called after an offensive package was delivered
to Gonads HQ in Charlton. A shocked Fit Bird, who opened the jiffy-bag,
fainted on the spot and is now receiving medical attention. An
ashen-faced Fat Col reports: “I removed the package from the premises
and examined the contents with the help of a uniformed officer.”
The parcel, he adds was found to contain “a CD of recorded material,
claiming to be from a sinister outfit calling themselves only
the ‘Red Dogs’.” A forensic team wearing ear-plugs and visors
discovered that the CD was full of ten so-called ‘songs’ such
as ‘We’re Nottingham’, ‘We Are Nottingham Forest’, ‘Ain’t Nothin’
But A Red Dog’, ‘Sir Brian’, and ‘Forest On 45’. The disc was
taken to a secure location and destroyed in a controlled explosion.
Col told local reporters: “We have received hate mail before,
but nothing prepared us for the deeply offensive nature of this
incident.” Police are investigating alleged links between the
attack and the suspected terrorist group Resistance 77.
March 22. We interrupt our blog silence to tell ya that Bruce
Springsteen joined the Dropkick Murphys on stage in Boston on
Friday and it’s up on YouTube.
And while we’re here, Insurgence Records in the US have just released
the definitive Redskins retrospective CD. Called ‘Epilogue’, it
features all four songs from the band’s first two singles, plus
demos of ‘It Can Be Done’ and ‘Keep On Keeping On’, a live version
of ‘Don’t Talk To Me About Whether’, an unreleased session track
and three numbers recorded by them in their earlier group, No
Swastikas (‘Strike’, ‘Unarmed’ and ‘Sickies’). The York-based
trio always said they wanted “to walk like the Clash, and sing
like the Supremes”. That they also wrote lyrics like (and about)
Trotsky might put some off, but their punky soul-enthused tunes
were mighty fine. What became of the band? They released one album
(‘Neither Washington Nor Moscow’) and split up in 1986. X. Moore
(aka Chris Dean) disappeared to Paris two years later and hasn’t
been seen since.
March 21. Oi album news update: Okay, brace yourself people,
Oi - The Race is now officially on! The battle of the Oi compilation
albums has started, but which will come out first, and which will
be best? The clear favourite is the official 30th anniversary
Oi! album, ‘Oi Never Surrender’ which may be released by Germany’s
mighty Contra Records sometime this year and which will definitely
feature tracks from the greatest Oi-Punk bands the world has ever
seen (Cockney Rejects, Cock Sparrer, us, the Business, and associated
bands around the globe) along with magnificent artwork by French
skin legend Alteau Salvation. Up against this mega-platter, the
David to Contra’s Oi-Oi Goliath, is ‘Oi Things Come’, which is
set for release on the tiny Soitenly label of Charlton SE7 with
amateur artwork by a teenage punkette commissioned by Colin ‘Fat
Col’ Gannon. Most experts agree that the eagerly awaited ‘Oi Never
Surrender’ comp is likely to be “the definitive release”, but,
says music critic and punk poet Garry Johnson “In many ways, ‘Oi
Things Come’ is more in tune with the rebel spirit of our movement.”
He goes on poetically: “It may have started as a wind-up, but
this maverick platter is the voice of the underdog, the song of
the street, the spirit of the herbert, the true punk rock beat.”
Indeed. And listen up, the Oi Organising Committee has now stepped
in to insist that “all songs on the album have got to be original
and all bands on the album have got to be real” – which may delay
the release but should improve the quality no end. Says Col “We
don’t want no joke bands, or cack bands. It’s gotta be new and
it’s gotta be good.” It goes without saying that no bigots or
bores should bother applying.
March 19. We’re still on a break, but here’s a quick news update
to keep you in the loop. The Nads management team hope to announce
a series of low-key UK gigs soon. We’re still working on setting
up a major July show in the Midlands, which, if confirmed, will
be very special indeed. Meanwhile work has begun on a new Gonads
studio album, scheduled for release next year ahead of Greater
Hits Vol II. Completed songs include ‘These Are Our Streets’,
‘We Are The Boys’, ‘Beer Can’, ‘England In My Blood’ and ‘Son
As the entire punk world waits with baited breath to see if
the 30th anniversary Oi compilation album ‘Oi Never Surrender’
is actually released this May as promised, the Oi Organising Committee
has given its blessing to Gal’s ‘Oi Things Come...’ piss-take
project. The tongue-in-cheek compilation album will be “a gently
mocking celebration” of the on-going late release of ‘Never Surrender’
(now 14 months behind schedule and counting.) The WM himself has
volunteered to organise bands who wish to donate tracks, and Fat
Col is masterminding the artwork. So far, we have been promised
songs by the Badoes, Foreign Legion and of course, the Misogynes.
Booze & Glory could be on board, and we are quietly confident
that the Orgasm Guerrillas will weigh in with a quality ditty
too. Anyone who wants to be considered should contact email@example.com toot-toot-Charlie suite. New songs, unreleased gems or rare mixes,
have a better chance of inclusion, the rawer and more raucous
the better. But be warned, with Fat Col, Gal and the WM at the
helm there’s a good chance Contra could beat us to the punch...
Meanwhile, Sean at Northwest Memorabilia tells us that he is
hoping to celebrate ‘Never Surrender’s eventual release by producing
a limited edition run of montages of the first four Oi albums
with nifty gold plectrums. There will be just twenty-five made,
and they will, he says “look the dog’s...”
The new Cockney Rejects album may now be put back until February
2012 to tie in with the release of their documentary East End
Gig news: Section Five have the following dates: The Red Lion,
Burslem, Stoke (31st March), Bedford Esquires (April 1st), De
Rocks, Antwerp (2nd April), Wild At Heart, Berlin (April 3rd)...
The Angelic Upstarts + Cartoon Violence + Hooligan play Redemption,
Derby on Labour Day, May 1st... Pennywise, NOFX, the Descendents,
Teenage Bottlerocket and more will play the 2011 Petite-Nation
Rockfest in Quebec in June.
This year’s Punk Rock Bowling tourney in Las Vegas has
a legendary line-up of bands, ranging from Cock Sparrer to the
Dropkick Murphys via Killing Joke, the Bouncing Souls, Me First
& The Gimme Gimmes, Stiff Little Fingers and many more over
the three-dayer. The bowling teams are all sorted now (they’ll
be announced on April 1st) but the poker tourney (on May 27) is
still open. If you’re a bowler and you want to play poker
it’s a $100 buy in and a 20 bucks registration fee. The
Gonads say as one: if Waistrel, the Beast and FB can’t get
us on this next year, they’re all bleedin’ sacked.
We’ll be back next Saturday, probably...
March 12. Okay, this blog page is closing down for a bit. But
here’s some news before we go. We’ve just heard from Contra that
the 30th anniversary Oi! album (‘Oi! Never Surrender’) has now
been put back until May, and consequently won’t be on sale at
Punk & Disorderly. Fit Bird tells us that Gal is “unsurprised”
but adds that he is seriously thinking of contacting a few bands
to put together a second compilation album to “mark the anniversary
of when the first one should have been released... last bleedin’
April!” It will be tentatively entitled, ‘Oi! Things Come To ’Im
Living legend Sandra Bigg (Really Big) contacts us from Cyprus.
She tells us she is “bed ridden” (insert your own smart-arse remark
here) but is planning to trek up the Himalayas in September 2012
to raise money for the Genesis Research Trust which concerns itself
with what Fat Col oafishly refers to as “women’s shit” (medical
research into the prevention, diagnosis and treatment of miscarriages,
infertility, ovarian cancer and the like). Sandra wants us to
help her raise £3,200 so we’re putting our thinking caps on. It’s
worth it for a good cause, and also for the opportunity to make
frequent entirely innocent references to scaling her twin peaks...
more details to follow.
Former Iron Maiden singer Paul Di'Anno has been banged up for
nine months for fraud (see earlier story). Di’Anno, real name
Paul Andrews, pleaded guilty to eight counts of benefit fiddling
amounting to more than £45K and will serve at least four and a
half months behind bars before he’s eligible for parole. During
his sentencing in Salisbury Crown Court yesterday, the Barnaby
Rudge, Jane Miller told him: “Your greed has cost this country
a lot of money. The claims were for a long time and for a large
cost.” She went on: “It must be a custodial sentence. I do not
accept you only got expenses. I give you credit for your guilty
pleas and reduce the sentence from the guideline 12 months to
that of nine months.” Rock on! Except can we be sure that this
Jane bird is no relation to former Sounds writer Robbi Millar,
who once begged Di’Anno to beat her with his bullet belt using
the words: “Do you know how to use this? Do you know how to use
it on me?” Our legal team, The Beast, tells us: “If a connection
can be established, ab initio, then this could well be an abuse
of process.” He goes on “Ms Millar invited the defendant to perform
an act of Actual Bodily Harm with the aforementioned bullet belt.
This is clearly an actus reus. It could even be a case of vicarious
liability. In this event, there is no doubt that Mr. Di’Anno has
grounds for an appellate jurisdiction and a certiorari. Thank
you very much, that’ll be £2000.” Remarkibold.
Random news: The Old Firm Casuals release their self-titled debut
7” single on April 22 (Oi! The Boat Records)... Out this week,
new albums from Rise Against (‘Endgame’, Geffen) and Screeching
Weasel (‘First World Manifesto’, Fat Wreck Chords)... Our Ska-Hop
buddies Swagga have just launched a new website www.swagga.co.uk
and tell us they’re flogging a “fantastic six track ep for only
£3” as well as tee-shirts and hoodies.
This is what we want! Gal’s Funny Old Bastards, coming to a town
near you very soon... if you live anywhere close to Gravesend,
March 11. Quick reminder, Matt Freeman’s band Devil’s Brigade
play the Tunbridge Wells Forum tonight with Stu Turner & The Flat
Earth Society, Houston Has A Problem and Sworn Red. Tomorrow they’re
at the Borderline.
Another 100 Club picture: Rula Lenska laughs as the Franken-Skin
clears the dance floor. That’s BO for yer. The idiot Fat Col wanted
to ask if she’s called Rula “cos she can take twelve inches” but
Frankie decked him. Back left is Watford Jon. Front in cap is
Zurich skin Fu.
Our New York brother band Maninblack’s debut single ‘New York
New York USA’ (Black Dalek Records) can be bought for a mere 99cents
orff of Amazon or @ iTunes.
Henceforth, the Herbert formerly known as Sir Terence of Hayes
(WM), shall be renamed the Worshipful Mo, in recognition of his
visit to Specsavers and emergence as the new Maurice Micklewhite
(aka Michael Caine) of punk. All together, ‘What's it all about...
Terry?’. So mote it be.
The new Bad Brains album is due out this summer on Megaforce.
Steve Ignorant & Friends have postponed their upcoming tour of
the US and Canada due to Visa problems, they say, ruining the
plans of a crack squad of Jersey skins who wanted to disrupt their
shows by playing volley-ball in the audience with bags of offal
NEW from Northwest Memorabilia: handsome mounted oi-oi collectibles,
like this fine Argy-Bargy offering featuring a CD and plectrum
set. Other sets include Cock Sparrer, the Rejects and the Last
Resort. All plectrums are made with the bands’ permission;
the CDs are legit too. They cost £15 apiece. All details
March 9th. A message to you, Rudy: the first Klub Skank of 2011
happens this Saturday, March 12, at the Cellar Bar in Chatham.
A quality evening of Ska, reggae and rocksteady sounds brought
to you by boss DJs. 8pm – 2am. Full address: Cellar Bar, Command
House, Dock Road, Chatham, Kent. Have it!
Random goss: Paul Weller is supporting the Kings of Leon at Hyde
Park on 22 and 23 June... Gallows are back in the studio recording
a new album...new Dropkicks’ album their “best for years”, according
to WM... Madness play Whitehaven Fest in Cumbria on 18th June...
March 8. Veteran rock scribe Pippa Lang has reviewed our 100
Club gig on Metal Talk. She writes: ‘Garry is looking good for
his age’ (Cheeky!) ‘When he rants the chorus to opening number
‘Punk Rock Till I Die’ it isn’t hard to believe he will... the
pogo-pit at a Ska/Oi gig is obviously much bouncier than your
average mosh pit and the Gonads have a particularly colourful
assortment of sproinking bootboys here tonight including, I swear,
Herman Munster... After ‘Yeti’ the jolly Ska of old classic ‘Oi
Mate’ and no-frills ‘Gob’, Garry self-effacingly announces: “We’re
like the punk rock equivalent of Gaddafi, no-one likes us but
we’re carrying on anyway”’... Pippa concludes: ‘Oi never
became commercial or mainstream or anything but what it set out
to be – anti-everything. This is where it all happens, down here
beneath street level, and this is where it all stays.’ Read
it all here.
Shop news from Fit Bird: please note we’re running low on stock
on a couple of items. There are just five copies left of ‘Plums’
on CD, and one vinyl copy of ‘Glorious Bastards’, so get in quick
if you want either because the re-orders take a while to come
through. We have just had a new batch of ‘Live Free Die Free’
come in on CD and on vinyl, but ‘Barking’ and ‘Schiz-oi’ are completely
sold-out and will not be re-ordered. Cheers.
The mighty Agnostic Front have posted two new tracks from their
new album My Life My Way (out March 22) on their facebook page.
Check out "My Life My Way" and "That's Life" here.
In unrelated news, Flogging Molly’s new twelve-track album Speed
Of Darkness will be out at the end of May.
*Infa Riot have reformed – and they’re playing Rebellion
on 5th August (tickets here.
No word yet on the Orgasm Guerrillas.
March 7. Gal’s Funny Old Bastards comedy show launches officially
at the Woodville Halls, Gravesend, Kent on May 25th. Starring
Mickey Pugh, Dave Cook and Willie Thompson, with Gal hosting.
Tickets £16. Box office: 01474 337 774. Address: Woodville Halls,
Woodville Place, Gravesend, Kent DA12 1DD. “We’re flying the flag
for blue collar comedy, with a night of mirth and mayhem!” he
The Franken-Skin continues to attract celebrity worshippers
into his evil orbit, as this picture with Frankie and Mark Wingett
from The Bill at the 100 Club mega-bash illustrates. Mark made
his big screen debut in Quadrophenia, and remains a connoisseur
of quality rock. The Franken-Skin’s own screen debut is fast approaching...
(PS The lady with the closed eyes, centre, is suffering from a
condition known by medical experts as ‘post-Nads syndrome’; says
a doctor: “Such feelings of ecstasy are generated among women
by a Gonads performance that they may enter a trance-like state
for an hour or longer; once in this state just a sniff of Mick
Maverick’s after-shave is likely to induce orgasm.”)
Nads update: We are in talks about a proper UK tour later this
year, and hope to be able to announce details of that, a major
benefit gig for BLESMA (British Limbless Ex-Servicemen’s Association)
and a July single release before too long. Meanwhile, the next
Heavy Metal Kids gig is at the Half Moon Putney on April 9, with
LAMF and the 335.
On balance it has
been decided that the Jolly Pranksters’ ‘Weekend of Carnage’ remains
largely unreported, for the good of the brotherhood’s international
reputation. The three-dayer coincided with Dan (Son of Oi)’s stag
night, and we’d like to thank Nacho Jase for sorting out the passes
for Peaches, a charming feminist institute dedicated to the liberation
of women cunningly disguised as a lap-dancing emporium. We should
also thank Brother Goon of the Cardiff Pranksters for diligently
finding and booking for our delight the very worst hotel not only
in Bournemouth but arguably on the entire south coast of England.
It made the youth hostel we stayed in for the last Berlin gig
look like Trump Towers. Defying all known laws of physics, it
somehow managed to be colder inside the hotel rooms than it was
outside in the street. Breakfast consisted of manky bread, processed
cheese (probably processed via a mangle) and what looked like
supermarket economy ham that had seen better days. The funniest
thing was they made us sleep in bunk beds – not a good idea
after 27 pints and a shot-athon; at least two of the brethrens
plummeted five feet to the floor over night, where they remained
until they were found in the morning covered by a thin layer of
frost. The place was run by a man so miserable and charmless he
made Basil Fawlty seem like a Butlin’s Redcoat. But nothing could
dampen the party spirit. We were joined by Oi Oi veteran Si Spanner
(aka Sex Shop Simon) and comedian Bill Outstanding for a Friday
night of boozing, when English Pranksters learnt about their Welsh
brethren’s unusual rituals (who could forget the ‘shirts off after
sixteen shots’ look?) A Nads away team of Nacho, Mick, South Coast
Steve and Flag-Girl Allyson came along to join the fun on Saturday
but unfortunately by then Gal had made his excuses and left (“My
guts exploded like Krakatoa,” he moaned. “Lightweight!” we replied).
But Vice Squad’s gig at Champions was “shit hot”, according to
Jase. And Dan (Son Of Oi) got off lightly, merely being made to
go boozing while dressed as a giant carrot (don’t ask) and go
clubbing as Elvis. It was a cracking weekend, although our livers
have yet to agree. Let’s just say that the scooter pranksters
who stayed behind for Sister Tracy’s Ska-n-Northern Soul knees-up
on Saturday night in Kent are looking a damn sight healthier this
morning than we are.
Good news for South East London bands: the Angerstein on the
Woolwich Road in Greenwich, SE10, are now offering free rehearsal
time on weekday afternoons. They're also launching a comedy open
night every Thursday starting this week
March 6. The reviews are still coming in for our 100 Club debut.
Allyson Maverick says: “God damn, you boys were hotter than a
pile of dung!’ Stu James, seeing us for the first time, reckons
‘It was great fun, I really enjoyed it and well worth a tenner.
Tonight the 100 Club, tomorrow the Hollywood Bowl.’ While Lotte
Daley writes ‘Gal’s an azzzzzzome singer and the band is swell!’.
Heavy Metal Kids fan Steve Abbott messages to say ‘The Gonads
put in a stonkin’ set!’ And even Chelsea Dom enthused ‘Another
top night. You guys were on form again.’ Only Peter Carbery strikes
a more cynical note: ‘The Gonads at the 100 Club?’ he jibes. ‘I
thought they were trying to save the place, not wreck it.’ Yeah,
thanks for that! Thanks too to Sally Newhouse for filming
‘Gob’ in HD. The Kids were on tremendous form, improving by
leaps and bounds with every outing. Thanks for the invite, fellas.
We’ll happily do it again.
S. The 335
were pretty good as well; a three piece r&b fuelled bluesy
rock band from West London, well worth a gander.
Please note a full-ish report on the weekend’s forty-handed Pranksters
beano may follow if any of the brethren manages to sober up, which
at the moment seems unlikely.
Gig noos. The New York Dolls are back in the UK later this month,
plugging their latest album 'Dancing Backwards In High Heels'
(out Monday week), with Earl Slick on guitar. They’re playing
two nights at the historic Old Vic Tunnels, an underground network
of Victorian red brick tunnels situated beneath Waterloo Station
(30th and 31st) as well as Newcastle 02 Academy (March 27) and
Manchester Club Academy (29)... There are still tickets available
for the Specials October tour. The full dates are 11 & 12 Wolverhampton
Civic Hall, 14&15 Manchester Apollo 16 Hull Arena. 18 Glasgow
SECC, 21 Nottingham Capital FM Arena 23 Plymouth Pavillions 24
Cheltenham Racecourse, 25 Brighton Centre, 27 Bournemouth BUC
28 Cardiff CIA 29 Coventry Ricon Arena and 3rd November: Ally
Pally... The Cockney Rejects, Evil Conduct, Superyob, Jenny Woo,
Raufhandel and. Gewohnheiten are lined up for this year’s Oi The
Meeting (6th - 8th May).
arch 4. Oh
what a night! A legendary gig at a packed 100 Club yesterday.
Famous faces including such monsters of rock as Deaf Barton, Gross
Halfwit and Zoie Wainwright (Who? - Ed) rubbed shoulders with
showbiz legends Vicki Michelle and Rula Lenska, and Oi-Oi heroes
like Watford Jon, Tottenham Sean and Big Badoe Dom as we shared
a stage with the Heavy Metal Kids. Porn star Ben Dover was there
too, but we don't know what he was rubbing. Pete Way's brother
was also in, as was Big Brother legend Susie Verrico, and so were
skins from Switzerland and punks from Sweden, Charlton and even
Hertfordshire. There was even a party from the Daily Star! The
Kids were on top form, while our set was genuinely described as
our “best ever” by impartial observers (Sid & Doris Gonad.) Gal
got a few titters by describing Mick Maverick as “the man who
makes Charlie Sheen look like an amateur” and by saying “It’s
a pleasure to play at the 100 Club. I haven’t spent a night
inside such a venerable rock ‘n’ roll institution
since Heavy Metal Heather...” (He wishes! – Ed). No doubt
there will be more stories remembered later, but whether we’ll
have time to tell you is in doubt as we’re all off to Bournemouth
tomorrow for a major Jolly Pranksters weekender. You may hear
more about it on Monday, but definitely not before! Oi, Oi! (Special
thanks to flag-girl Allyson, merch man Dave, FB and of course
Record noos: the UK Subs album ‘Work In Progress’ is now out
on vinyl from Captain Oi, for a meagre £10.99. And out on Monday,
the Maroon Town album Urban Myths (Rockers Revolt). ‘A totally
infectious vibe,’ says Springline Jamaica, and quite frankly they
HC legends Agnostic Front play the Black N Blue Bowl in New
York City on May 28, along with Gorilla Biscuits, Terror and more...
Send us your St George’s Day gigs, parties and events via firstname.lastname@example.org
and we’ll plug the bugger out of them!
New vid from the Smoking Popes here.
March 3. Here we go! A lively ‘impressionistic’ shot of Charlton
Boy Chris Weeks with us for ‘Tucker’s Ruckers’ on the beer crate
that passes for a stage at the 12 Bar on Saturday; (pic by Jel).
See you up the 100 Club tonight.
Our old pal Paul Di’Anno is up in court for benefit fraud a week
tomorrow. Di’Anno, real name Paul Andrews, faces jail time for
having £45grand away in fraudulent claims – he’d been nicking
incapacity benefits since 2002, while still performing. We’re
not sure when Paul’s money problems started but doing a book deal
with John Blake is traditionally the route to bankruptcy. Opinion
is split as to whether to say “Good luck” or “Hanging’s too good
for him.” It’s probably too late to Run To The Hills, but the
next ‘Jobs Not Jails’ is for you, mate...
An internal inquiry has narrowly cleared Nacho Jase and South
Coast Steve of round-dodging charges on grounds of insufficient
evidence, but Lord Waistrel has given both a caution saying that
such low activities will never be tolerated in this band, as the
roll-call of sorry round-dodgers no longer with us clearly demonstrates.
The Dirty Metal Gonads may be coming out of retirement for a
military benefit festival later this year; watch this space.
More from Georgette C’s review of ‘Greater Hits Vol 1 Plums’:
‘The new sound is dependent on the band chemistry between the
hard-charging rhythm section of Mick Maverick on bass and South
Coast Steve on drums, and the explosive guitar work of Nacho Jase
(Jason Poole from Waysted); all of which conspire to lift singer
Gal Gonad (life-long maverick Garry Bushell)’s raw growl to another
level. The lyrics remain closer in feel to Benny Hill than George
Carlin’. We can live with that. Meanwhile Canadian fan Gill
emails to ask: ‘I would presume that ‘The Joys Of Oi’ and ‘Punk
Rock Will Never Die’ have been saved for the second volume?’ Almost
certainly, Gill. We’ll publish a list of songs for the next album
ahead of going back into the studio.
March 2. We interrupt this blog with reports of a dire development.
Both Nacho Jase and South Coast Steve are suspected of the most
heinous crime imaginable in our circle: round-dodging. Fat Col,
in a pathetic attempt to ingratiate himself with us again, has
undertaken to investigate the allegations that at the 12 Bar on
Saturday Nacho and SCS did ‘receive liquid refreshment and gratefully
imbibed thereof whilst making no effort to return the favour.’
Lord Waistrel comments: “Any man who breaks the sacred moral code
developed by drinking men over the ages by dodging his round is
nothing but a cockroach in human form, a poltroon, a parasite,
a lowly being with the hygiene of an overly active dung beetle,
the heart of a louse and the morals of a schizophrenic baboon.
There is no place for such a wretch in the company of herberts.”
Wise words indeed. If found guilty, Nacho and Steve may be fined
twenty pints a piece by order of the committee.
March 1. Morning team. Here is the running order for the 100
Club gig on Thursday. Doors: 7:30pm. Stage times: The 335, 8:00-8.30;
The magnificent Gonads, 8:45-9:30; the Heavy Metal Kids: 9:45-11pm.
It’s gonna ROCK!
An incredible revelation. After our little dig at our double
gorgeous web-mistress Batttttty yesterday it turns out that she
actually did go to the same school as Anne Robinson - Farnborough
Hill Convent - although a few years later, obviously. Who would
have thought it? One is waspish, witty and a strict disciplinarian...
and so is the other one!
Here’s the full running order for the London International Ska
Festival at the Clapham Grand next month. Thursday April 21: KEN
BOOTHE (Jamaica), JAMES HUNTER, GIULIANO PALMA & THE BLUEBEATERS
(Italy), MAROON TOWN plus DJs CLIVE CHIN (Randys), RHODA DAKAR
(Bodysnatchers/Special AKA), TOMMY ROCK-A-SHACKA (Japan) and TAKESHI
OKAWA (Japan-The Ska Flames/Sun Shot). Friday 22 April 2011, 6pm-3am:
DAVE & ANSELL COLLINS (Jamaica), THE TROJANS, THE LOAFERS (one-off
reformation), the HOTKNIVES (original line up), THE CAROLOREGIANS
(Belgium), SKAOS (Germany), LES EJECTES (France) plus DJS: GAZ
MAYALL (Gaz’s Rockin Blues), JIM COX and GREEDY G. Saturday 23
April 2011, 6pm-3am: THE ENGLISH BEAT with DAVE WAKELING, DUB
PISTOLS, INTENSIFIED, NAPOLEON SOLO (Denmark), THE AMPHETAMEANIES
(Scotland), JIMMY THE SQUIRREL plus DJS LYNVAL GOLDING (The Specials),
WRONGTOM and FELIX HALL. Sunday 24 April 2011, 6pm-2am: BOB ANDY
& MARCIA GRIFFITHS (Jamaica), THE SKA FLAMES (Japan), BIM SKALA
BIM (USA), THE SIDEWALK DOCTORS, CARTOON VIOLENCE (Wales) plus
DJS MARK LAMARR, the DUB VENDOR ALL-STARS, and the TIGHTEN UP
CREW ft. CHAMPIAN MC. Full details and tickets here.
Brilliant Poly Styrene has cancelled touring for the foreseeable
future after being diagnosed with cancer. We wish her a full and
speedy recovery. Poly’s new album ‘Generation Indigo’ is released
on April 26th.
If you’re in Bournemouth on Saturday, Vice Squad are playing
We note that the London Diehards’ song ‘Suicide Bomber’ has been
removed from YouTube; click on links to it from other sites and
you get the message: ‘This video has been removed as a violation
of YouTube's policy on shocking and disgusting content.' It is
not certain whether this is a reference to the graphic close-ups
of self-exploded ‘martyrs’ contained therein or just the singing.
Florida punk band Asshole Parade have just announced a seven-date
Japanese tour. To see Asshole Parade in this country, get down
to the House of Commons any weekday.