May 31. Round two in our tale of gorgeous Gonadettes tracking
down global celebs for our big farewell show - here's Bev Elliott
in Las Vegas with Zach Galifianakis from the Hangover films. Zach
was more than up for joining us on stage but alas yet again Lord
Waistrel has vetoed it on the reasonable grounds that "Hangover
3 is utter shite."
While we're here, the righteous anger of punk balladeer Louise
Distras will be heard at this year's Glastonbury. Louise is performing
on 28th June on the Left Field stage, as part of Billy Bragg’s
Radical Roundup. She’s promising us a release date for her debut
album, Dreams From The Factory Floor, shortly.
May 30. Lord Zion from glam horror merchants Spit Like This,
tells us that he is in the process of getting a film off the ground.
NORMALITYVILLE HORROR: THE MOVIE is said to be a ‘dystopian sci-fi
thriller centred around a man who is wrongly exiled so he joins
a revolution to overthrow a corrupt government’. The film shares
a title with the current Spit Like This album, but the two are
only connected by “a rough theme.” Zion explains: "The theme is
oppression, expression and a desire to be more - but that is where
the link ends. This is not a SLT movie, but an independent film
of mine which will be a cross between Escape From New York and
A Clockwork Orange.” Sadly there is no news about our own majestic
cinematic opus, Curry On Up The Gonads, as our “street-team” have
struggled to raise much finance for the project, and what little
they have raised was unwisely invested (by Fat Col) on a nag that’s
still running. However in more film news, Gal and David Courtney
are both set to star in new action movie Looters, Tooters & Sawn-Off
Shooters. What’s it about? Butterfly collecting, sniffs Fit Bird
with what we feel is unnecessary sarcasm...
News that BBC radio is reviving Dick Barton Special Agent has
stoked hopes that Frankie Flame’s visionary song of the same name
might be re-issued as a single and finally head for its rightful
place at the top of the charts. Get in, Frank!
What of the East End Badoes? It’s the question virtually no-one
is asking, but we’ll tell you anyway. Apparently Terence Hayes,
PM, has abandoned plans to record ‘We Beat The Blitz’ for the
band’s new e.p. on the grounds that it will be released on a German
label and it might not be diplomatic to remind them...instead
El Tel us working on a replacement song called ‘Where Have All
The Dockers Gone?’ about how the East End has been yuppified.
Except yesterday Tel called us in a state of distress to say that
he’d spent several hours writing the lyrics but had mislaid them.
We can reveal that his ‘notes’ were found later by his missus.
They consisted of four words: ‘red wine, Stella Artois’. He’d
written a shopping list.
The secretive Mad Butcher contacts us from his Stalinist bunker
to whisper that he has re-released the Toasters’ Pool Shark album...
and also that he’s released the new ep from RedSka called ‘Bella
Ciao’ which we think means beautiful goodbye, which we’ll take
as a cue to piss off as it’s now 5am and the red wine has run
out. Until the next time...
Midweek Madness. May 29. Gal's latest Rancid Sounds pod-cast
show is finally up with special guests Missing Andy and quality
tracks from Boomin, The Crunch, The Fallen Leaves, Noise Agents,
Leah McCaffrey, Buster Shuffle, Goldblade, Alien Sex Fiend, Laurel
Aitken, Discipline, the Hickoids, the Gonads, Bonecrusher, Farse,
Argy Bargy. Hear it here.
This is the last ever Shoreditch show. This podcast is now taking
a break for a couple of months but, sniffs Fit Bird, "It should
be back by August."
Decca Wade's got a book out! Brilliant Upstarts drummer Decca
has published his biography, surprisingly called I'm An Upstart
which is ghosted by Ronan Fitzsimons and tells his story from
his early days in Jarrow and South Shields to punk rock'n'roll
infamy. "It's a very weird feeling having my whole life in black
and white," says Decca. "To be honest when I saw the book I started
to cry." (We felt like that about Dan Brown's Inferno - Ed). He
goes on: "It's a very strange feeling to know that everything
that is important to me and has made me the person I am is in
the book, Ronan has done a fantastic job and I'm looking forward
to going on a book tour with my band in the near future." Decca's
book is available from www.ardrapress.co.uk.
May 26. Gal’s latest
literary podcast, with Pete 'Manic Esso' Haynes of the Lurkers
is up now, an in-depth discussion of the punk years, Pete’s books
and plays and politics. One-time Gonad and full-time GLM drummer
Pete is on hilarious form, he’s darkly funny, subversive & spiky
throughout. “What’s the difference between the Monkees and the
Clash?” he asks. “The Monkees had better songs.” Ouch. …
Meanwhile a behind-the-scenes row is threatening to engulf the
Punk Rock Curry Club and tear it asunder. Purist John King claims
the Club has been “taken over by teetotal late-comers who don’t
stray more than a mile from their own front doors.” He goes on:
“The Originators were Gal, me, Fatty Lol and Mark Wyeth. It started
in The Falcon and Panahar in Battersea and switched to Aldgate
East, before ending up out in the sticks dominated by the Diet
Pepsi Crew. Time to take it back to core values – surely?” Strong
words indeed, and while we wait for a rebuttal from club steward
Steve Whale, we can report that John is planning to go out on
a provisional wing and switch the next meet from Lee to East London.
“It’s time to head back to Brick Lane and Battersea,” he says.
“Back to our roots... starting with a six hour pre-curry booze-up
in the Pride of Spitalfields.” Oh blimey. Let’s pray that the
PRCC does not go the same way as the Joly Pranksters...
Junior Marvin will headline the 2014 International Ska Festival;
your festival Earlybird tickets while you can, there are only
60 left - and you’ll save £80+ across the 4 day fest.
STOP PRESS: latest Gonads Quasar result. Gonads: 1653, Wickham
Wizards: minus 325. Team Gonad – leaving the world choking in
Weekend round-up: here it is at last! The cover of the long-awaited
Built For Destruction album which will be on sale in the UK from
7th July on CD and vinyl at the very latest. Artwork by Steven
Friel. The controversial platter features fifteen tasty tracks,
many of them previously banned, plus the original version of 1977's
'Stroke My Beachcomber, Baby'. Much more detail nearer the time.
Gal recorded his latest Rancid Sounds podcast yesterday with
special guests Missing Andy who turned up for the last 15 minutes
due to traffic chaos on A12, but no Paul Hallam who was laid up
with the trots - bad news for a Stalinist. There are quality tracks
from Boomin, the Fallen Leaves, Farse, The Crunch, 100 Men, Buster
Shuffle, Noise Agents, Alien Sex Fiend, Laurel Aitken, Discipline,
Leah McCaffrey, the Hickoids, us, Bonecrusher, Klasse Kriminale,
Goldblade and Argy Bargy. BUT sadly it may be the last punk n
Ska pod for a while as Bloodstock radio is temporarily homeless
and will be operating out of Malcolm Dome's sock drawer for the
next few months. We can't say what effect this shock news will
have on the local economy except to say the guv'nor of the Owl
& Pussycat public house was last seen weeping.
RANDOM news: Crashed Out's album Crash N Burn has been re-released
by Randale - limited run of 100 on orange vinyl, CD comes with
three bonus tracks and a video of 'Cushy Butterfield'... Missing
Andy are back in London for a gig at the Garage on August 2nd...
Coming soon the new King Hammond album, Hot Skin Music - tracks
include 'Skin 2 Skin', (It's All About The) Bassline', 'I Am Your
King' and 'Everyone's Playing Ska (Nowadays)'; 22 tracks in all
in a special box that also comes with a KH badge & sticker. This
is a limited edition of 500 & once they're gorn, they're gorn.
Events: Big Ska knees-up in Charlton: Ska Valley, on 19th September,
at Charlton Liberal Club, Charlton Church Lane - a night of Ska,
reggae, rocksteady and 2-Tone... Big 7 scooter rally, 2-4 August
at the Hop Farm, Tonbridge, with our mates P45.
Our mate Matt went to the Texas Oi pub, Bill McCabe’s,
and swiped this poster for our blog. He reports: “The bloke
behind the bar was speeding off his head playing a Dropkick Murphy
cover of Cock Sparrer's 'Working' at full volume and shouting
at the punters.” Bliss!
STOP PRESS May 22. We are horrified by the brutal murder of a
British soldier by reactionary nut-jobs on the streets of Woolwich
today. The savage killing would have been shocking wherever it
had occurred, but we feel doubly close to this as some of us were
born in Woolwich and the Gonads originated in neighbouring Charlton.
As a mark of respect to our forces and as a gesture of solidarity,
we ask our readers to consider donating whatever they can to Help
For Heroes. No surrender to terror.
Midweek Madness, May 22: it looks like we’ll be playing Stoke-On-Trent
on September 28th, further details to follow... in the meantime,
the big question is: who should compere the Gonads’ farewell gig
in December? Bowie is selfishly unavailable, however our crack
team of Gonadettes have been busy tracking down a suitable alternative
big name – here, for example, is our dear friend Christine Peake
with former England captain David Beckham at a Lakers game. Becks
was interested of course – who wouldn’t be? But Lord Waistrel
has blocked the deal on the reasonable grounds that Beckham never
played for Charlton, and has sent the Yeti out on a quest to find
Derek ‘Gypoe’ Hales instead.
Random guff: Street Sounds is now properly on twitter, here...
there’s a free two-day punk ’n Ska fest at the Haygate in Telford
over the weekend of July 5th, with Random Hand, Cartoon Violence,
Skalinskis, Garageband and many more... the Simmertones release
their new album on 31st May with a launch party at the Rainbow
hotel in Torquay; veteran DJ Gaz Mayall will be joining the band
on stage for a couple of songs as well as spinning some tasty
STOP PRESS: the next Gonads live show will be on 15th June at
a location near Brands Hatch in Kent. The gig will be a secret
one, by invitation only. Said the Beast: “There are a lot of disreputable
punters out there – trouble-makers, head-cases, drunks, delinquents,
rascals, ruffians and women with loose morals... and we want to
make sure they all come to the show.”
May 20. News that Gal will be interviewed by John Robb at Rebellion
was greeted with gales of laughter here at Nads HQ. Says an insider:
“Gal can’t hear a thing out of his right ear and John is a notorious
whisperer. It’ll be like that scene in Fawlty Towers when dotty
old Mrs Richards tried to talk to Manuel...
Talking of odd couples, Gal recorded his latest literary podcast
last night, with Pete ‘Manic Esso’ Haynes talking about his books,
plays, politics, comedy, class, GLM and of course the Lurkers.
We’ll let you know when it’s up. Both men report industrial-size
hangovers this morning thanks to Podcast Peg’s super-strength
home-brew. How good is this ale? Well put it this way, they finished
recording the pod at 7.45pm and Pete “Just one more glass” Haynes
was still there at midnight...
Wonderful East London Ska band The Skints play Camden Koko on
Wednesday night – their biggest-ever headliner. There will be
filming! Hear their new single, ‘Out Of My Mind’, here.
A text arrives from Terence Hayes, PM, currently laid up at
home after an operation on his knee. It states: ‘I have dropped
my mobile into a cup of tea, now when people ring I can hear them
but they can’t hear me.’ Hmm. It’s a novel twist, Tel (not to
mention a blessing), but we doubt that they’d go for it on Dragons’
Random news: The Crunch – featuring Mick Geggus, Dave Tregunna,
Terry Chimes and Sulo - have posted a video for their debut single
‘Down By The Border’ here
- it’s out on vinyl on June 3rd... Lee Thompson’s Ska Orchestra
play Manchester’s On The Wall club on Friday (24th)... Maninblack
needs a new bass player who “must be male, over 40, NYC resident,
have pro gear, fluent in UK '77 Punk, familiar with early Reggae,
not intimidated by live electronics. Basic keyboard ability, working
knowledge of bass synthesizers helpful.”... Meanwhile over in
JR country, they’ve struck Oi!
Here is Paul Hallam, AKA the Stalin of Style, modelling anti-fascist
banners in Genoa. We are sometimes asked where we stand on such
matters. Obviously we are against fascism in all its forms but
as self-proclaimed situationists, the Gonads rise above the mundane
political world. For readers with an interest in these things
however, here is a handy guide from the forthcoming book Street
Politics: Homage To Catatonia by Ray Stamford AKA The Watcher
(edited down from its original 197,000 words). SHARP - Skin Heads
against Racial Prejudice, a well-intentioned and principled bunch
true to the original spirit of the cult who formed in New York
City in 1987 and are sabotaged only by the inconvenient fact that
skinhead is one word, so they're really SARP. Sarpy sods. LOLS
- the League of Labour Skins: dormant organisation dating back
to late 1979, completely inactive now as even their veterans haven't
got a good word for Miliband (and they weren't too keen on Blair
or Brown either).
PPGB - the People's Party of Great Britain; a new-born socialist
anti-EU organisation which is the brainchild of author John King,
based on his Ten Principles and the idea that "thirty good men
in combat jackets" could make a difference. RASH - Red & Anarchist
Skinheads, formed in New York in 1993 to "win back the good name"
of the skinhead subculture from "boneheads and racists"; has since
spread to Europe where RASH supporters blotted their copy books
by wrongly targeting the likes of Walter 'Wattie' Buchan who although
a nitwit is no Nazi.
Cock Against Racism - ad-hoc grouping set up by ICF Casuals
circa 1982, dedicated to fighting bigotry by enthusiastically
bedding women of varied ethnic backgrounds; its members are now
aging but Viagra helps them keep up, the ahem, fight. B&H - Blood
& Honour, sometimes called 28 and often called far worse, these
Neo-Nazis formed in 1987 and are the real swivel-eyed loons of
today; mercifully on the decline in the UK they still provide
muscle for the BNP and are strong across Eastern Europe (see also
"Monsters Of Oi" - a transparent front set up by fellow travellers
in East London/Essex.)
Rudies - 2-Tone skins, true to Jerry Dammers's vision of skins
as working-class, colour-blind, and street savvy; now have their
own 2-Tone Village in Coventry. 'Grey Area' - more a term applied
to bands than people, referring to punk/oi groups identified by
German Stalinists as dodgy "fence-sitters" because of their refusal
to get sucked into political bullshit. Most of them are "completely
apolitical" which means that they merely chose to vote UKIP in
the privacy of their polling booth... as is their right. (For
English Stalinists, see Hallam, P.)
Class War - violent anarchists formed in Wales in 1983, committed
to physically bashing the rich, stopping the City, pogoing on
a Nazi (etc); may appear crusty. There's no hope without soap,
chaps. Libertarian Skins - anarcho-skins with a few bob in the
ELF - the English Liberation Front, secretive underground group
committed to an English revolution; not to be confused with the
EDL who aren't. EDL - English Defence League, started on the terraces
of Luton as an anti-Islamist protest movement; their ranks were
swelled by hooligans from all over the UK but appear to have been
rapidly infiltrated by the far-Right, possibly because the far-Left
started calling them fascists. Skins Against The Nazis - short-lived
group set up by Arsenal supporters in 1978.
Red Skins - there were quite a lot of these back in the day,
but in the UK they were tarnished by their links to terrorists.
Maoists - there were even a couple of Maoist skins around in the
early 70s, and a heavy Dutch band called The Rondos who were about
in the late 70s/early 80s and were often called Maoists but weren't;
they used Maoist imagery but were far to the Left of Maoism. (The
best-known Maoist band were Prairie Fire, Yanks who were drawn
to punk only to be completely let down when Mick Jones told them
the Clash were just using revolution to sell records).
Tory Skins - the Thatcher Firm! A sizeable minority but they
have never been vocal or organised because they're too busy making
money. Apolitical skins - probably still the majority; I asked
for information, but the apathetic bastards wouldn't fill in the
forms. Mosley Boys - small aging and largely inactive sect of
little serious intent; known for their distinctive black Ben Shermans,
the Mosley Boys struggle to explain how Sir Oswald's belief in
the supreme heights of Western culture could reasonably be stretched
to include the poems of Barney Rubble etc. NF - National Front,
a near-dead UK Nazi-run party; linked to Rock Against Communism
and later the White Music Club run by Nick Griffin which robbed
rightwing skinhead-punk bands blind.
Oi Against Racism - started as a tour in 1981, OAR tours still
take place in Germany. Red Action - "squaddist" group of street-fighting
anti-fascists expelled from the SWP for their enthusiasm for violence;
now defunct, Red Action put on Oi Against Racism shows in the
early 80s and had close ties to the IRA. Skin Fein - IRA supporting
skinheads back in the 80s, more a gang than an organisation; many
prominent/infamous Loyalist prisoners were also ex-skinheads (ironically
perhaps the Catholic skins were more likely to be Skrewdriver
fans). Oi The Party - proposed by the nefarious Ministry of Delusion;
not yet unleashed on the world and may merge with the PPGB (ibid).
The League of Umpire Loyalists - my mistake, these are just into
May 19. Ska News: Our talented mate Nick Welsh takes his acoustic
show The Life & Times Of A Ska Man to the Riverside, Sheffield
on May 31... the Folkestone Skabour festival has changed its name
to the far better Folkestone Ska Splash... and lovable Essex boys
the New Town Kings are back with a new singer, Dabs...
Superyob’s ‘Glad to be grey’ gig in Bedford last night was sparsely
attended we hear. The Bitch who did pass through, whispers: “There
were under fifty in, many of them grown men not much shy of pension
age still wearing DMs, braces and their jeans up their arses.
It’s as sad as seeing a 60-year-old Mohican. Still I expect they
still look like kids to Frankie.” Ouch! We have nothing against
people dressing however the hell they like, but sniffs Fat Col:
“Remember how we used to laugh at middle-aged Teds back in the
day? Sometimes it’s best to let it go.” (He certainly has! – The
Bitch)... The Gonads obviously do not endorse the views of The
Bitch or Fat Col. We just hope and pray that the Bitch doesn’t
cause trouble down at the Great Skinhead Reunion in Brighton at
the end of the month.
favourite shop page for old and new Ska sounds.
Midweek Update. May 16. Okay folks, Street Sounds issue three
is definitely out now, featuring Pauline Black, Argy Bargy, Infa
Riot, King Hammond, Punks In Prague, London Books, Mod and Casual
news and much more. It’s on sale here.
We’re backing this mag all the way because it is for and about
our culture, it’s written by participants not voyeurs, and it’s
real grit, not plastic pop poop.
It was a fine turn-out for the Punk Rock Curry Club on Tuesday,
with the Old Firm Casuals, Steve Whale, Daryl from Cock Sparrer,
Roi and JJ from the Last Resort, Jethro and Carrie from Buster
Shuffle, the PM, Robin Guy, Richard England and Vive Le Rock’s
Eugene Butcher among the many who made the trip – the Chelsea
contingent swerved it to go to Amsterdam for the match, whereas
Gal “phoned in sick” (Wimp – Ed). But this is interesting: without
the drinkers, John King, Gal, Manic Esso, Mark Wyeth from Symarip
and Chelsea Dom, we’re told that the price per head was a measly
score. With them the bill per head is at least double that – as
it was the night before at Gal’s rowdy B-Oi-fday Bash at That
Turkish Place beloved by Pranksters and the Eltham Young Hounds.
Random news: The Cockney Rejects movie East End Babylon will
finally be released on DVD on June 17th... Martin Lewis from Bad
Manners will be joining the SkaNads on keyboards for studio work,
the band is still looking for a live organist... here’s
a trailer for the new Johnny Moped movie... Finally if you
want a good night out in London this weekend, Buster Shuffle are
supporting Chas & Dave at the O2 on Saturday. Now that’s entertainment...
The Dropkick Murphys have released an iTunes charity ep to raise
cash for the victims of the Boston Marathon bombing. It features
a newer version of their ‘Rose Tattoo’ song, with
contributions from Bruce Springsteen, plus live, acoustic recordings
of ‘Don't Tear Us Apart’ and ‘Jimmy Collins's
Wake’ – all for $1.29. Every penny raised goes to
the victims fund... AC/DC are backing plans to erect a statue
of Bon Scott in his home town of Kirriemuir, Scotland...
STOP PRESS: The Beast has moved decisively to end the confusion
hanging over this band. Nacho Jase and South Coast Steve have
been granted leave of absence, and with immediate effect, Mark
McMighty and Paul SkaNad replace them on lead guitar and drums,
joining Gal and Mick Maverick. Said the Beast: “Nothing will be
allowed to derail the Gonads’ plans for our final seven months
of existence.” New gigs in England and Germany are expected to
be announced after the release of ‘Built For Destruction’ and
songs from the new album, including ‘Oblivion’ and ‘C’Mon Motherfucker’,
will feature in a revised set which is also likely to include
‘Beano’ and ‘Oi Along The Watchtower’ for the very first time.
Other band additions may be forthcoming and a promo video will
be shot. The Beast explained: “This split is amicable and indeed
may be temporary but we are a punk rock institution, there is
no way on earth that this great band will play second fiddle to
ukuleles and folk fuckwittery.” He added: “The clock is ticking.
On December 31 everything changes. There are 231 days left to
experience the Gonads. We are about to release the greatest album
we have ever made and after that we are going out in proper, pukka
Ziggy Stardust style.” As the Pranksters would say: so mote it
May 13. Happy b-oi-fday to Gal, 48 years old today (are you
sure? – Ed). To celebrate we’re closing down this blog and getting
smashed for a week. See ya later, masturbators.
Bollocks. A potential Gonads Stoke gig in August and two plum
dates in Germany this October have been scuppered by band members
having commitments to live shows with their other projects. We
can’t name them for fear of reprisals, we’ll just refer to them
as ‘JN’ (anagram) and ‘SC fucking S’. The Beast reacted to the
news with a smile akin to that of a shark dropped into a tank
full of haddock but said simply: “If we weren’t retiring at the
end of the year, I’d be minded to replace them with musicians
who are younger, more reliable and with a proper sense of priorities.”
But we are, so that’s the end of it. Unless... well, Fat Col,
who can be as cunning as a fox schooled by Peter Mandelson in
the art of duplicity, reckons he has a plan to “fill the gap.”
Hmm. Watch this space.
More bad news. It seems we can’t even go down Clark’s pie &
mash shop in Exmouth market later this month, because with heavy
heart Tottenham Sean advises us that it closed down about six
weeks ago. Says Sean: ‘To say I am gutted is an understatement.
Clark’s was my favourite P&M shop of them all. We even started
the SDF, my old skinhead mob’s reunion there with double pie and
double mash all round. I was inconsolable for days. Why is it
we live and work in the greatest city in the world and the powers
that be seem hell bent on ruining it?’ Beats the hell out of us,
May 12. Some Mod pals want to organise a fund-raiser for Acid
Jazz label boss Eddie Piller to help him through his difficult
time with illness. But a passing cynic notes: “If there were any
justice in the world, the money raised would not reach Ed’s bank
account until at least eighteen months after it was due, and after
the organisers had helped themselves to a hefty undeserved ‘commission’...
” Whatever can he mean?
Fears grow for the future of our FrankenSkin, who is said to
be acting “like some bestial Shirley Temple” and succumbing to
temper tantrums. Among Frank’s many outrageous post-Croydon demands
are 1) a longer slot on stage 2) a whole ox and vestal virgin
(gender unspecified) on every gig rider and 3) even cheekier,
he wants to sing on stage with us as well as dance. We never had
this problem with FB or The Beast!
The Street Dogs and Pirates Press Records are helping to raise
cash for the Richard family (richardfamilyfund.org) whose young
son was killed while his younger sister and mother were seriously
injured in the Boston Marathon bombings. The Dogs are offering
a $5 virtual donation package which includes a re-mastered studio
and live version of ‘In Defense Of Dorchester’, plus a live video
of the track. The physical donation package comes with a t-shirt,
badge, and sticker as well as the downloads, and will cost UK
buyers £22.80. All proceeds go to The Richard Family Fund. More
Good luck to Stief A Billy as he records his solo album today
with a handpicked team including our own Mick Maverick and Paul
from the SkaNads. It’s a shame that certain members of the Nads
family are sniping at the great man. Sandra Lane, our moral conscience,
has hit out at Stief’s very catchy ‘P.H.A.T. Girl’ song, saying
“spelling fat p-h-a-t doesn’t make it less offensive to women.”
While that old curmudgeon Fat Col (definitely not p-h-a-t) was
heard moaning that ‘Southend Rhapsody’ “don’t make sense, parts
of Spain are like Essex on the Med, so what’s he banging on about?”
Don’t ask us. The knockers and naysayers will be choking on their
words soon however as we hear Stief’s ‘Cocaine’ song is set to
be featured on the soundtrack of a new action movie.
May 11. Interesting. Fit Bird pauses, mid-vajazzle, to tell
us that Gal is working on a new one-man spoken word show, “full
of rib-tickling punk and rock anecdotes an’ that”; although it
probably won’t be unveiled in public until next year’s Edinburgh
Festival. In other actual news, Nads bass ace Mick Maverick guests
on Stief A Billy’s solo album, recorded this weekend; the Orgasm
Guerrillas are looking for a singer “with an operatic range”,
the Beast has been re-installed as Gonads manager and the SkaNads
are still trying out Hammond organists but they expect to make
an announcement soon.
E ora sono qui some more shots from Genoa, for your delight
PIX SENT SEPARATELY HERE PLEASE
are the lovely Pukes performing their new single, a cover
of Sparrer’s ‘Because You’re Young’ – out on Damaged Goods, May
Meanwhile Chelsea Dom, the bard of Bromley, has supplied these
suggested dishes for Slippery Lee Wilson’s Skunx Cafe venture:
Angelic Pop Tarts, Smoothie & The Banshees, Theatre of Cake, Iggy
Slop, Ducky Boys a l’orange...
Talking grub, next Tuesday night sees the latest Punk Rock Curry
Club get-together at a select location in South London. If you
haven’t been invited it’s probably because Steve Whale thinks
you’re a knob. Upsetting yes, but you’re an adult, deal with it.
May 10. If you’re thinking of buying this new Ben Sherman book,
50 Years Of Style and Culture don’t bother. Our pal Robert splashed
out 30sovs on it only to discover that it’s full of ridiculous
factual errors, including the probably libellous claim that the
Rejects were headlining the Hambrough Tavern on the night of the
Southall riot. They weren’t even on the bill. Elsewhere a picture
of early Chelsea Casuals in the West Stand at Stamford Bridge
is labelled as Arsenal. It’s written by a birdbrain called Josh
Sims who claims to have worked for the Financial Times, probably
as a paper boy. On this showing we wouldn’t trust him to number
the pages in the right order.
Our mate Rodger asks us to give the Soul Partizans launch party
a plug, so here goes. It’s a night for independent labels and
unsigned acts next Friday (17th) at the Caves in Farringdon Lane,
London EC1. Live bands include Natural Self, Lea Lea and Miniature
Cities. Definitely one for the young, hip and groovy – so if it’s
okay with you Rodge we’ll go down Clark’s pie shop instead.
There’s an Texan Oi compilation, handily called Oi! The Texas
Volume 1, out on 1st June, featuring, it says here: “twelve of
the finest Streetpunk/Oi! bands in Texas”. The release party is
on 15th June at Bull McCabe’s in Austin. We don’t know the bands,
we haven’t heard the songs but we sure as hell like Texas.
STOP PRESS: Gal Johnson released from nick next Thursday, according
to our man on the case, The Beast...
May 10. Hallelujah! The mystery of our missing album has been
solved – it was all down to under-paid postage, and the masters
are currently languishing at Charlton’s Royal Mail depot. But
that’s okay because engineer Pat Collier (ex-Vibrators) came to
our rescue yesterday and knocked out a brand new mix which is
already in the post (with the right stamps) to Randale Records.
Thanks Pat. (The dodgy ‘kidnap’ messages we’d received were obviously
just the work of a cruel and malicious wind-up merchant, almost
certainly slippery Lee Wilson). The only downside was we didn’t
get the word to Stief in time. Our rockabilly enforcer spent the
day offering out some of the hardest firms in South London on
our behalf. This is how he came back...
Randomarama: The Street Dogs are streaming their new three track
e.p. Rustbelt Nation – it’s out now on Pirate’s Press... The original
East End Badoes are busy rehearsing their next e.p. which will
include a cover of ‘The Harder They Come’ and new song ‘We Beat
The Blitz’... Billie Joe Armstrong has branded 'Gangam Style'
singer Psy “the herpes of music” which is a terrible insult. To
May 8. Certain messages that we received yesterday about ‘Built
For Destruction’ suggest that it really has been nicked; one in
the form of an untraceable email describes our new songs as “lewd,
lascivious, salacious, outrageous!” So they must have heard them...
We’re not going to let this rest. We are sending out our top enforcer
to hunt down the tealeaves. Bad men tremble when they hear his
name – for the hero of Harlow, rockabilly revel, Essex’s answer
to Duncan Norvelle, our very own FrankenSkin, the Stief A Billy
himself is tooled-up and on the case. Yeah, the scum will live
to regret the day they crossed us...
Poor Frankie Flame had a bit of bovver over in Sweden last weekend.
He went clubbing after his show, like any sprightly 93-year-old
might do, and popped outside for a fag only for the Russian bouncers
to rudely refuse to let him back in. They also accused Frank of
dealing and doing drugs! Ridiculous. The Flame doesn’t chase the
dragon! They just come to his gigs and throw their sopping wet
bloomers and incontinence pants at the stage. A spokesman for
Frankie certainly didn’t say: “He doesn’t get treated like this
at the Lewisham Darby & Joan Club... ”.
Song of the day:
‘Laced Up’ from Victory
May 7. This is getting beyond a joke. Now the master-tape of
‘Built For Destruction’ has gone missing somewhere between Forest
Hill and Charlton Village. A grim-faced Fat Col tells us: “Either
this is deliberate sabotage by the taste police or the album has
been stolen by our many jealous rivals... ” Hmm. He then muttered:
“Or it could be just lost in the post because some tightwad didn’t
pay 70p extra for it to go recorded delivery.” (And would that
feckwit tightwad be one Gannon, C.? – Curious Ed). Whatever the
truth this latest set-back is as welcome as an 1980s celebrity
at a girls’ school.
Record news: ‘Down In The Dirt’, the first new Black Flag song
for 27 years is available to download here.
It’s proper tuneless and painful, writhing about like Liam Gallagher
being force-fed a bucket-load of blue peanut M&Ms.
We saw punk turned comic Mark Rough at a comedy charity night
in Southend last night. He is as funny as fuck. Proper working
class humour, biting one-liners, down-to-earth attitude. No wonder
he’s not on telly...
May 6. Lee Wilson is pursuing his dream of opening a skunk cafe
and asks you our gentle readers to supply more dishes for the
menu. So far he’s got the Infa Fry-Up, Eddie & The Hot Dogs, a
Cress salad, loaded potato 4-Skins with extra cheese, Frankie
Flame-grilled burgers, the Billy Bragfast (served on left of the
plate, may cause severe wind), Sharon Stiletto’s Sausage Surprise,
Generation Eggs, breakfast UK subs and the Condemned Tasty Four
(not available on the Mensi Menu, may leave an unpleasant after-taste)...
All meals served with free tap water... in a paper bag from twenty
feet above your head.
Track of the day: Tim Timebomb & Friends cover version of Rancid’s
‘Hyena’, just out...
The Crunch - the punk super-group featuring Mick Geggus, Dave
Tregunna, Terry Chimes and Sulo - have announced their debut UK
live date; they play upstairs at London's Garage on 5th June.
The Paradimes will play the Specials' pre-show (and after show)
party in Leicester on 19th May at The Donkey music bar, Welford
Rd Leicester (10 mins walk from Demontfort Hall). Plus Ska-Amanga
and Ska DJ. Live music from 4-30pm; food + barbeque available.
Ska-Amanga on stage 4-30pm; The Paradimes on stage 6pm. Admission:
£5 - or £4 if you show your Specials tickets on the door.
May 5. Word is filtering back from last night’s big Oi! gig in
Genoa. Brilliant Italian band Klasse Kriminale were dubbed “the
best in Europe” by Paul ‘Stalin of Style’ Hallam, while Gal says
Infa Riot were “impressively tight” (especially drummer Alex)
although if you’re interested in trivial things like an actual
review, you’d best buy yourself issue 3 of Street Sounds, as the
presses have been held to umm ‘slip it in’... Gal and Paul were
invited along to DJ, but didn’t start their set until 2.30am on
Sunday morning. We detect some tension between the erstwhile buddies
as we’re told Stalin wasted the entire afternoon on a Tony Feedback-style
walking tour to 1) “look for a bank”, which mostly involved going
up and down windy alleys in the red light district, and 2) he
then set off on a search for “a tomato-free pizza”, as Hallam
doesn’t “do tomatoes” (or sat-nav, Wednesdays, or lately round-buying).
When he finally found the tomato-free pizza he moaned that it
was “bland and tasteless”; yeah because it was missing something,
possibly fucking tomatoes...
The gig was inside a massive squat, run by anarchists, and the
mostly young crowd lapped up Street Sounds, 50 copies were sold.
We expected the pair to come back with tales of the city’s fine
Renaissance art but the only ‘culture’ they and the Infas experienced
was an Oi! pub serving London Pride on draft, decked out with
punk and skin memorabilia, Union Jacks, a West Ham banner and
the Cross of St George (he’s their patron saint as well as England’s.)
Back at the venue, slippery Lee ‘Daktari’ Wilson was up to his
old water bomb tricks, giving bassist Ozzy a neat soaking from
the dressing room window high above the stage. Thinking it had
been thrown by Barry Damery, poor Oz chucked his beer over the
guitarist. Chaos was only averted when Lee’s giggling face was
spotted ten feet above, like the ghost of pranksters past. What
else? Well, Gal revealed another string to his sporting bow by
thrashing Hallam’s wretched ‘Team Mod’ at table football (10-1,
10-2, 10-0) before leaping on stage with Klasse Kriminale to croon
‘White Riot’. The lads’ Ska set went down well for the first hour...
but then a drunken Hallam killed the mood by slipping on Sham
69’s ‘Rip-Off’ and shouting loudly “Tim Scargill’s the real Sham!”
The house lights were immediately turned on and the punters quickly
evacuated. DJ? The man’s a buffoon.
*Can this be true? We hear that there are attempts to set up
a punk-Oi-Ska supergroup consisting of Spizz on vocals, Max Splodge
on drums, Andy ‘Scoops’ on bass and Nick Welsh on guitar. Their
name? How about Round-Dodgers Feckin’ United? No doubt they’ll
be swiftly signed by Acid Jazz.
May 4: May the fourth be with you... some good news. The gremlins
have been sorted, the ghosts in the machine dispatched and Gal’s
podcast is finally up and running on Bloodstock Radio - featuring
tracks from the Great Malarky, Noise Agents, Missing Andy, Booze
& Glory, the Upsessions, The Straps, Goldblade, the Tennysons,
the Skoidats, Closed Shave, RDB, Bonescrusher, and more plus studio
guests Iron Maiden legend Dennis Stratton, Stief from the Noxious
Toyz and a passing Stalin...
The London International Ska Festival has launched a new label
and Social Club called Hotshot and Scorcher, whose first release
will be the London International Ska Festival 2013 Collectors’
CD featuring previously unreleased, rare and exclusive cuts from
100 Men featuring the great Mik Whitnall (of Babyshambles), Pama
International Meets Wrongtom, The Sidewalk Doctors, Potato 5 &
Laurel Aitken, Pama Intl meets Manasseh and Ed Rome - available
now from here
- more releases will follow.
Stop Press: our best wishes to Oi! poet Garry Johnson, currently
in Chelmsford Prison for reasons we have yet to discover.
May 3. Gal flies off to beautiful Genoa tomorrow for a spot
of DJing with Infa-Riot and Paul ‘Toes’ Hallam (Stalin of Style)...
no doubt some kind of report will seep through eventually.
Record noos: well-respected Boston chaps the Welch Boys release
their new album, Bring Back the Fight next month on Sailor's Grave
Records... Jenny Woo’s My Vengeance album also comes out on Randale
in June, featuring 14 unreleased tracks.
Danny Garcia/Chip Baker films who brought us The Rise & Fall
of The Clash are about to unveil Sad Vacation, a definitive film
on John ‘Sid’ Richie's fall from grace in NYC. Featuring: Sylvain
Sylvain (New York Dolls), Bob Gruen (rock n roll photographer),
Cynthia Ross (The B Girls), Kenny Stinker Gordon (Pure Hell) and
more. Trailer here.
May 2. The new action-packed issue of StreetSounds is available
to pre-order from here
- featuring Matt Worley’s chat with The Selecter’s spiky Pauline
Black, four meaty pages of Argy Bargy, that old rogue King Hammond,
Punk In Prague, John King on London Books, Klub Foot recalled,
Chelsea Dom’s Diary, plus news, reviews & much more. All for £2.
Bargain! (We’re told ordered mags will be despatched a week today
as some advertisers still haven’t supplied their artwork.)
At last the return of... Controversy Corner! Allegations have
trickled in that, if true, could possibly undermine the heroic
accounts of the Gonads’ team’s glorious Quasar victory at the
Battle of Bromley. For starters it’s now been claimed that the
opposition ‘Team Herbert’ consisted almost entirely of children.
A clearly flustered Fat Col denied the charge explaining that
“Some of them were teenagers, some as old as 14, and you know
how nifty them saucepans can be around a bit of laser technology.”
Colin Gannon is 55.
May 1st Happy May Day! Before you nip off Morris dancing with
the PM, here’s a quick round-up of exciting stuff...
1) For starters, the final mix of our ‘Built For Destruction’
album was completed yesterday. All agree that in terms of song-writing
it is the best Gonads album to date, and according to Fat Col
“a definite return to the true Gonads spirit... a proper punch
up the trousers.” The full track listing is: ‘C’mon Motherfucker’,
‘Oblivion’, ‘Punch Punch (Your Fuckwit Head)’, ‘Ugly Town’, ‘Glorious’,
‘Dogging In Dartford’, ‘Diana Schuler’, ‘Harry May’s Revenge’,
‘Still Coming Blood’, ‘Dying For A Pint’, ‘Cunt Tease’, ‘My Cousin’s
Niece’, ‘Charlton Warrior’, ‘We Are The Boys’; bonus track ‘Stroke
My Beachcomber Baby’ (1977 version – to remind you how pathetique
we used to be!). There are a couple of minor last minute hitches
but we’re confident that, after months of controversy, rows and
legal wrangles the album will be on sale by the end of June. Phew.
2) We hope to announce more Gonads gigs soon – in Birmingham,
Bedford, Bavaria, Barrow-in-Furness and other places beginning
with B. Gal meanwhile is confirmed to be appearing at Rebellion
discussing his books with John Robb.
PS. We were wrong yesterday. Our spin-off band The SkaNads are
due to play the big Skamouth Festival in October – “if line-up
issues are sorted”. Sorry for any confusion.
As you may know Gal is editing a definitive, exhaustive and
above-all truthful history of Oi. To make this book as good as
it can possibly be, we need your help. The publisher needs pictures
of bands and fans, flyers, old gig tickets etc. If you have any
of those please contact email@example.com.
RIP our old mate Nosher Powell, actor, stuntman, diamond geezer
and in his own words “a big, ugly bastard.” Fred started his film
career as a teenager, on a horse with a lance at Agincourt in
Henry V but became a market porter, professional boxer (he sparred
with Ali) and a professional minder. He was a giant character,
and also a big fan of Bushell On The Box, which makes him all
right in our book (it’s a very dirty book though). Oi Oi that’s
yet lot, get yer Maypoles out and find a queen to crown.